The Verdict

About three things I am certain:

1) Catherine Hardwicke is an AWFUL director.

2) Melissa Rosenberg can't write a screenplay.

3) Despite the first two, I don't know if I can be productive or socially competent until I see Twilight again.

Even if I outright hated the film, being at the midnight show last night was an experience in itself. Before the movie teenage girls screamed, chanted, and counted down the minutes until the show began. They clapped and squealed when Jacob and Edward appeared on screen. They shrieked with laughter over parts of the movie that were unintentionally funny (bad writing and so-so acting produced disastrous results).

But, here's the deal--despite the fact that Robert Pattinson looked like he was going to have an aneurysm (or worse) every time he was supposed to "smell" Bella and completely overacted his part, and that so much silly stuff was added to the story when the writer could have just used better parts from the book that were cut, and even though the chick from Thirteen was the WORST person ever to play Rosalie Hale, the movie was satisfying in many ways. First, Robert Pattinson is hot. Second, the actors playing the kids at Forks High were hilarious. The guy playing Jacob was adorable (even if he did just have one way of saying his lines). Kristen Stewart was the perfect choice for Bella. And the guy who played Volcheck on The O.C (who I will forever call Volcheck) did an amazing job as the villain (he was probably the best actor in the whole thing, actually).

All in all, Twilight is super cheesy and poorly executed, but I am happy that there is a movie at all. What do you expect for $30 million, anyway? In fact, I may just need to blow off my work today to catch a solo matinée...you know, just to be sure it was only so-so.