I haven't really been following this whole Jon and Kate Plus Eight thing, but I bought an issue of OK! for my flight to Georgia and got myself caught up. Frankly, I'm horrified.
Here's what I don't understand: When did fatherhood become optional?
As a young woman, who plans to get married and have children one day, I am somewhat terrified of the idea that my future husband might one day decide, oh, sorry, being in this family isn't for me anymore. Of course, I don't know the whole story and just read one little article about the situation, and really don't care about Jon or Kate or why they have a bajillion kids, but seriously, what the fuck?
A couple weeks ago, I picked up an issue of Time while in a waiting room and came across an article about the state of marriage in America today. There was a quote from writer Leonard Michaels which knocked the wind out of me: "Adultery is not about sex or romance. Ultimately, it is about how little we mean to one another." What's scarier to me than ending up a single mom, and alone, is this idea that someone you thought loved you can so quickly decide he doesn't.
I think about relationships I have had, how they all start out exciting and happy, and have, so far, ended much less so. While I try to not be a pessimist, I can't help but worry now when I see Kate on the cover of various tabloids, how the life she thought was secure melted away because her husband decided he wanted to screw women ten years her junior. I'm sure they started out excited and happy, and in love, just like the rest of us.
I Know, I know. I'm Awesome
- Natasha
- Half empty or hall full? I don't freakin' know. As a bookworm turned writer, who lives off (on?) coffee and candy, both of which subsequently fuel nights typing on (or staring at) my MacBook until my eyes hurt, I'm just trying to keep my glass level. Making light of what seems to be a continual stream of humiliation helps. (So do margaritas.) In short, if I don't laugh--mainly at myself--I'll cry.
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have ya seen the show? she never let a moment go by without publicly undercutting her husband. henpecking wears on you after awhile.
I have not--my opinion is based 99% on speculation and 1% on an article in OK magazine.
While I still think the guy is a douche for walking out on his family (and into the arms of not just one, but two twentysomethings), I totally get that he wasn't satisfied in his marriage or with his wife. I'm sure neither Kate nor Jon set out to backstab and disappoint each other, but, look where they are now. that's the saddest part of all for me: how love can turn so very sour.
i listen to dr l to much to comment on this subject. A dude walking out on 8 kids seems like a redflag for all his new girlfriends.
i mentioned redflags and this is not redflags...damn
hey, it's all the same to me. :) And you're so right--I didn't look at it that way before. Why anyone would want to date him (besides the publicity/five-seconds-of-fame) is beyond me.
as a guy (and a guy who has been forced several times to watch the show) i definitely don't condone his behavior, because no matter what it's gonna suck when a family is split apart.
however, it is true that kate was an absolute bitch and constantly tore into to him every little remark she could get in. and that was ON camera. i can't imagine what she must've been like off camera. secondly, they weren't exactly planning on having that many kids, so i'm sure this has been fairly stressful for him (although that doesn't justify leaving them).
thirdly, and i think this is the most important, just because he is leaving her DOES NOT mean he is leaving his kids. right now they're spending time apart because it's better for him to be away than for the two of them to be fighting (there's a recent episode where kate takes the kids on vacation by herself even though he's still living at the house which shows the difference). he still loves his kids, and is still going to be in their lives, i'm sure, but for their sakes and i'm sure under TLC's orders, he's out of the picture for a little while.
but divorce is bad.
Totally agree Brian, except for this one point: "They weren't exactly planning on having that many kids." My answer to that is, simply, too bad. I know Jon's been using that as an excuse, but you can't plan for anything in life, really. You get the cards you're dealt and you have to make the best of them. Not trying to devalue how hard it must have been to become a father of eight at 22, but the fact that he wasn't planning on it can't be used as a reason for leaving his marriage.
I actually watched an episode and didn't like Jon or Kate. And the older kids are total brats (disrespectful to Kate, especially). It's beyond me why anyone would want to watch this show at all...
I don't think it's an excuse for him so much as it helps me to understand him a little more. Under no circumstances do I think that what he's doing is really the best choice, but that factor at least helps me to follow along with what I feel must be one of his rationalizations.
I half agree with you about the older kids, Natasha, although I don't think that they're both brats. I'm pretty sure that only one of them is, she just happens to be a HUGE brat. The other one never really speaks at all.
Brian you are so right. Damn twins and their look-a-like-ness!
And I see your point...how terrifying and scary for a 22-year-old dude to have eight kids all of a sudden. And then to get berated by his wife every day for every little thing he did?
As I read more about what's going on, I can see how hard it must be for both sides. But really I think they should just stop doing a stupid TV show and actually focus on their kids/family.
I don't agree with you there. It may seem like the tv show is detrimental to their lives, but think about how expensive it is for a young couple, together, to raise one kid. Now think about how much it would cost for a young couple, separated, to raise eight kids.
The show pays for basically everything. They send them on vacations, set up meetings with the casts of other TLC shows that the kids watch (they went to the Cake Boss bakery one time and the kids had a blast), provide security against the paparazzi, and pretty much take care of the family's finances. Having grown up in a family with 8 kids (I'm the oldest), I understand how that money is helping the kids lead as normal of a life as they really can.
Not only that, but I'm pretty sure without the show, and the little gripe sessions that Kate gets to have on camera, she'd probably lose her mind. That poor woman has no one to talk to.
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